Even the seasoned parent needs a little help dealing with common parenting issues.Traditional parenting books are afraid to tell you everything about close encounters of the baby, toddler and third-year kind. But this book isn't traditional. You'll learn parenting truths like: - Raising a baby isn't like raising a dog. It's like being a dog. You're always sniffing butts.- Getting a baby to drink their medicine is like getting someone with arachnophobia to drink a spider, except harder.- 95% of helping a toddler who falls down is trying not to laugh at how they fell down.- The only thing threenagers can't lose is their voice.- Parents don't go on vacation. Kids go on vacation while their parents babysit them.